DITTY CABOODLE

All the Misery Money Can Buy

A penny for your thoughts; a dollar for your grave. Die for what you bought: the life of a slave. Every life is a wishing well. Every wish is a day. Every day is a living Hell, just tryin’ to make it pay.

We’re caught in a world that’s turned upside down. We’re looking for something that just can’t be found. I feel forsaken and I don’t know why. We’re busy making all the misery money can buy.

Standing still on the interstate; I can’t afford no toll. All the money that we make, it can’t buy back our soul.

I was born under the sign of the gun, bullet in the chamber, hammer under Sam’s thumb. I was told everything is for sale, and so I sold my soul to the company jail. They gave me one pill for depression, two pills to get high, three pills for the pressure, four pills to survive all the misery money can buy.

When I went to sleep I was eight years old. The snow was on the peaks; it was late July and the ice was coming down the creeks. The starlight shined through the pines and cast shadows on my bed. I woke up twenty years later with a shadow on my soul instead.

Now the stars fall just like cannonballs. And the rain comes warm and calm, just like napalm, burning up the memories of everything we’ve done. They say she’s old but I know that she’s dying young.

Sleep well my Son. Dream you’re one with the sunlight, and make bright the whole galaxy. See once for me, what’s beyond that cosmic sea? Does it shine eternally? Or is this all we got? And do we have a shot at breaking free?

I’m walking down that narrow Tennessee track, moonlight shinin’ off my back. I feel that girl still messin’ with my head. The tracks look wet just like they’ve bled. I’m leaving late and slow; then I hear that whistle blow.

God gave me this train to ride; roll me over to the other side. I’m feeling low, movin’ through the night, but crossing bridges will make it all right.

That woman cut me clean down to the bone. I never felt so damned alone.

When that sweet Georgia sun shines in my eyes, I’ll be free from all of her lies. She gonna miss me when I’m gone. Lord knows I’ll be ramblin’ on.

Storm is brewing on the Great Divide: tensions rising, so are the tides. Scales tip; society slides. Mama said the Devil’s been beatin’ his bride.

God willing and the levee holds, we’ll stop trading her blood for gold. She’ll give us back the life we sold and take us back into the fold.

Everybody wants to dream like they’ll live forever, but we’re dying today. Liberty is seeking refuge from the weather; it’s washing us all away.

Killing and stealing like it was a game. Tuning out just to try to stay sane. But every debt leaves a mark; every death leaves a stain. Let it rain, let it rain, let it rain.

Come on, God, let the damn creek rise. Drown them fools in their money and lies. Leave the world to the meek and wise, and let Lady Liberty dry her eyes.

God willing and the creek don’t rise, Lady Liberty will dry her eyes. Pull that thorn outta her side, and cut that motherfucker down to size.

Sister, hold fast; this storm can’t last.

My alarm is a warning screaming every morning, ‘Get Up!’ It’s kill or be killed, so pop that pill and get up. Everybody’s looking to roll them sevens. Got the fear of God, and the promise of Heaven is a corporate ladder, so you better get stepping. Get up!

If ya go to their schools and follow their rules, you’ll get up. You know I took that bet and just watched my debt blow up.

Now I’m tired of living just to pay the rent, giving my life to the one percent. The good times came and the good times went. So get up!

Well, everybody I know is about to blow, so blow up! They can’t run the show if there ain’t nobody shows up. We’re tired of living just to pay the rent, giving our lives to the one percent. The good times came and the good times went.

Like sands through the hourglass, numbers on their list, I don’t know what we’re dying for; but I ain’t going out like this. So get up!

They say we can’t beat ‘em but they sure look bent. And if we all stand up, we could make a dent. So get up!

Nights are short and the days are long. The bank’s broke but the love is strong. And your breath next to mine is like a dance. The coal train rattles our window pane; and on the tin roof I can hear the rain. But you’re sleeping like it was perfect silence.

The roses are blooming right outside the door. I do my best to enjoy them, ‘cause I know soon they won’t bloom no more. And every breath and every step that you take I stow away, so I can see your smiling face on my dying day.

Lonely people’s dreams blow through our room. And the only thing I see that I know to be true, when the shadows roll away, is you.

A lot’s changed since we were young. We went from playing with loaded guns to this hole in our heart, looking for home.

I see you there right in front of me. But it’s like reaching out across the sea, trying to let you know that you’re not alone. Hey, hey, you’re just flesh and bone.

I know the road’s been hard, but don’t forget who you are. There’s a child there who’ll never be grown. Hey, hey, he’s just flesh and bone.

We crave the comfort of the homes that we broke. We’d save it all, but it all went up in smoke. But what was lost ain’t carved in stone; it’s just flesh and bone.

We were born in an avalanche. Our lives have been a game of chance. No apologies for the seeds we’ve sown. Hey, hey, we’re just flesh and bone.

And all we had is just on loan, this flesh and bone.

I’ve been taking time, to make time to spend it all on the ones I love. But when I get home I see I’ve been blind to the things that a home is really made of.

Empty room where children played, empty bed where lovers laid… An empty highway and a heart full of longing today.

I’ll be leaving town tomorrow, chasing down that American Dream. They’ll tell you heartbreak and sorrow are just a part of making the scene.

When dawn finally breaks on this lonely night, I will see your face fade into the light of a new day.

I tried to settle down in the Smokies, but the kudzu and the women kept trying to choke me. San Antone weren’t no better, but it had more booze. I thought, “Hell, money is all I got left to lose.”

I tried to milk it slow but it went away fast. It’s always time to go; the good times never last. But for all I know there’s a whole lot more waiting in that big, wide world right outside my door.

I hear the call; it echos in my vein with the sound of a thousand screaming trains. Am I bound for glory? Or am I bound in chains? Life and death, Hell, it all looks the same.

I put my ear to the track and I listen closely. Is that a freight train coming to make a ghost of me? Or a silver streamliner built for masters, coming to take me on to greener pastures?

It come up slow so I hop on fast. There’s always some place to go; the bad times never last. But for all I know, there’s a whole lot more waiting in that big, wide world right outside my door.

Gypsy come; Gypsy go. Gypsy, save my soul. Gypsy, break my poor heart in two. Gypsy, steal my breath; Gypsy, deal me my death if it’s all you got left to cure these blues.

I cried myself a river so I built myself a bridge. But it’s long gone turned to splinters; your ship was too big. So I cried myself an ocean and I built myself a dam. So if sailing is your notion, your ocean is what I am.

Gypsy, smile; Gypsy, weep. Gypsy, sing me to sleep. Gypsy, turn out the light when you leave. And in the dark I will lie, just like your sweet lullaby. But in you, Gypsy, I still believe.

Sinnerman, where you gonna run to? All along that day…

I run to the rock. I cried, “Help me, rock! Please hide me, rock. Won’t you hide me?” All along that day…

But the rock cried out, ‘I won’t hide you.’ The rock cried, ‘Ain’t gonna hide you.’ The rock cried, ‘I won’t hide you.’ All along that day…

So I run to the river; it was bleeding. I run to the sea; it was bleeding. I run to the sea; it was boiling. All along that day…

So I run to the Lord. I cried, “Help me, Lord! Please hide me, Lord! Won’t you hide me?” All along that day…

But the Lord cried out, ‘Go see the Devil!’ The Lord cried, ‘Go to the Devil!’ The Lord cried, ‘Go to the Devil, Sinnerman!’ All along that day…

I cried, “Power! Power! Power! Bring down power!”

So I run to the Devil; He was waiting. All along that day…

I cried, “Lord, Lord, don’t you hear me praying, Lord? Can’t you see I need you, Lord? Don’t you see me down here?” All along that day…

But the Lord cried out, ‘Where were you when you ought to be praying? Where were you, Sinnerman, all along that day?’

released September 11, 2020

“All the Misery Money Can Buy” is the third full-length album by Gasoline Lollipops

Soul Mine

SoulMine

It’s been a long time / digging in the soul mine  looking in the dark for something that shines / All I found was coal / All I felt was shame / when I heard that devil calling my name /

Then I found a vein of gold and a vein of blood / I made a vein cry for a vein of love / Something died inside, now I feel better / I bled ’til I shed that scarlet letter /

(Chorus) Hold on tight son / ’til that coal turns to diamonds / Life springs from deep wells / Faith is born in the forge of Hell / Forge on /

Though light be lost and lines be crossed / stay strong /

I lost my name at the center of the earth / I swallowed my pain until I proved my worth / Then it was gone /

Find the truth / it shines right through carbon / I started out digging for diamonds and gold now I’m digging through the long dark night of the soul  to see dawn /

Chorus..

It’s been a long time / digging in the soul mine  looking in the dark for something that shines / All I found was coal / All I felt was shame / when I heard that devil calling my name..

I got roughed up by them mustangs / down in Memphis, Tennessee / where the river runs dry and the women all livin’ offa OxyContin dreams / I said maybe, baby, it’s just me / but there’s a prowler down by the stream / I’m going down to the river just to wash myself clean / I’m going down on the banks of Galilee /

I struck outta luck in Washington, with a gun against my throat / I said maybe she’s a poet / but it’s all murder that she wrote / She left me with a five dollar bill / and a rabbit skin overcoat / I’m going down in the pines / in the pines / gonna let it shine on down, gonna let it shine /

I bought some $10 boots in Houston / from a speed freak named Suzanne / She was jumpin’ up into the chimney / coming back down in the frying pan / I said, baby, maybe you should lay off / that tin foil and the match / and clean up all that garbage you got laying out ‘round back / I’m going down / East Colfax for a bag and some gin / I’m going down just to see what kinda shape I’m in

I got robbed by a federal policeman / down in southern Mexico / He thought I was drunk but I was just on a mescaline roll / Now if you can’t find the truth / that I buried deep in this song / you can go down to the river just to prove me wrong..

Old Jesse was an outlaw / it was just his bad disposition/ Some say he was born that way / I think he probably made a decision / Old Jesse liked the girls / he loved every one he saw / but everybody knows / the sheriff’s daughter, Rose / made him forget them all / Oh, the sheriff was a bad man / but he had a good excuse / The ends will justify the means, my friends / I’m gonna put Jesse’s head in a noose / Jesse said /

(chorus) A woman and a gun / will keep me warm / will keep me warm all through the night / A woman and a gun / will keep me warm / will keep me warm / in the afterlife /

One day by the banks of Green River / the sheriff caught Jesse with his daughter / He spoke not a word, just squeezed that trigger / and blew ‘em both into the water / Jesse felt his feet in the mud / Rose watched a cloud pass made of blood / The river was in their lungs / and these words were on the tip of his tongue /

Chorus

All my faith is a bullet / all my God is a gun / And all this world is just smoke and mirrors / I’m gonna break them one by one… /

All that’s real is a woman / all that’s true is her flesh / and all you got is her memory / for company after death…

He was a Casanova / like a god he came to show her / But all he had was frightening / all he taught was lightning / so like a storm he passed right over /

(Chrous) And over like a dice / Maybe someday he’ll get lucky / and stop rolling snake eyes / And don’t he deserve it / don’t he deserve just a piece of the pie / But if a man ain’t living on these broken hearts / tell me how is he to survive /

She said your heart is dead and cruel / through your fingers have slipped many fools / But this one is gonna stick/ like a thorn / like a knife / like anew trick, honey / Then her skin blew away like leaves / a flock of aces flew from his sleeve / Her curves were snakes / her breath was drugged / in an instant he fell in love / He said take me / and began to crack / her eyes were heart attacks / One kiss from him to her / then she blew him over /

(Chrous) Slightly different

Ever since I got up today / I’ve been wanting to go to bed / seems like ever since I was born / I’ve been wishing I was dead / I need brotherly love just like a bullet in my head / I wish everyone would get away from me / ‘cause I’m starting to see red /

(Chorus) I said / Being a child of God don’t please me like it should / Given my gift of free will don’t free me like they said it would / You know a deal with the Devil / is starting to sound good /

I was born unto a race who survived by being mean / the empire they built was a mindless money grubbing moron’s wet dream / And if I stay it’s gonna kill me, but I don’t have the strength to leave / so I gasp for air that can’t be spared / ‘cause the apocalypse needs to breathe /

(Chorus)

I went down to the crossroads like Robert Johnson of old / ‘cause that’s where you go to deal with the Devil / or at least that’s what I’d been told / All I saw was storm clouds / All I felt was cold / All I heard was a belly laugh /

(Chorus)

I’ll give you another hour then I gotta run / gotta fly away and leave you to fall / leave you to stuff your flowers in a shotgun / and below their petals all over the wall / I know you think you’re on a crusade / you’ve got a world to save and it’s hanging by a thread / I know you think you’ve got to be brave / but there’s nothing but a slave inside your head / I know you’re living in a dream world / even though I know this must seem real /

Now everything will fall / I want to go back to Montreal /

So you want to rise above duality / you want to transcend both day and night / I guess I’m old fashioned / I just don’t share your passion / for a never changing eternal twilight / But go on and give oblivion a shot / go on and fade to grey if you’ve got to / And maybe you’ll do better without God / and maybe I’ll do better without you /

Well, I wish that were true / and I wish that were you / sitting across from me / instead of this impersonation of who you used to be /

Everything that we were comes down to this / and all we built were sinking ships / And by tomorrow we’ll both just be shadows on the wall / take me back before we lost it all / I wanna go back to Montreal /

Remember back when you were just a little kid / scared of the dark, laying in your crib / waiting for mama to turn on the light / but she never did / Remember back when you would watch those stars / they seemed so bright and they seemed so far / but you knew one day they’d be falling around you / so today they are /

(Chorus) Because the world turns / just like the sea churns / just like the sun burns / just like we all fall in turn / just like the world turns / and it burns /

I fell into the Bardot / they pulled me back again so / I don’t believe in no happy endings, no / I don’t believe I want to do this again /

Remember back when
you were just a little kid / you said you’d never fall in love / then you did / Now you’re holding your broken heart in your hand / remembering what mama said she said /

(Chorus)

(Repeat verse)

I got home late last night / it was all locked up / I guess that’s your way of saying you’ve had enough / I wish I could say the same ’cause I’ve had my fill / but I don’t think this stuff is gonna stop ‘til it kills / 

All the things that I’ve lost don’t even seem to faze me / my devotion to destruction never ceases to amaze me / Either I must be stupid / or just flat out crazy / like you said you’re the first and the last to I ever love me, baby /

I put on a mask every night and go downtown / there life is simple / you make friends by buying rounds / But the mornings are harder because I wake up all alone / with my shame like a fuse burning down to the bone /

I would apologize if I had the sincerity / but these days it don’t seem like there’s much here left of me / you don’t have to speak / I know you agree / Like you said / I’m a ghost of the man / that I used to be /

I’m haunting his skin / here we go again / look at this mess that I’m in / I pray every day / for this madness of to end /

Jesus only told us to hang up our sins / so what did what we do / we hung up him / So we’ve got hangups aplenty and sin in surplus / and a rusty old nail lodged deep inside of each of us /

And this old crown of thorns  / it keeps getting tighter / This golden shining sun / it keeps getting brighter / And all of God’s children are playing with guns / yeah, there’s a rusty old nail / lodged deep inside of everyone /

(Chorus) These nails will corrode on their own / we must not forget / we’re built of oceans and stones / we cannot be broken and we will not be owned / So the Devil may come on strong / but he’ll be leaving alone /

These days pass like dreams and there’s none in between / I sleep like a stone / wake up in a stream / its flow drags me over all manners of pain / until I stumble home to my nail / and I drive it in again /

(Chorus)..

I had a dark dream of you / damned if it didn’t come true and send us both straight to Hell / Oh, it’s just us and fate / and all these spinning glass plates / we just watched as they fell / But when the smoke had all cleared / we were still standing there / but who are we now / I know the time has come / to make good what we done / but I just don’t know how /

(Chorus) How long does it take / to mend what we break in one night of disease / Forget that I asked / just put me to task / I’m eager to please /

Lay down your head and cry / let out what’s inside / I won’t judge or run / for I hold the same dark shadow / but it’s time to let it go / and step into the sun /

(Chorus)

The past is a chain / it holds us down / But there’s no weight to the now / so go on, baby, and spread your wings / release all those things / that had you down /

(Chorus)

released December 15, 2017

“Soul Mine” is the second full-length album by Gasoline Lollipops

RESURRECTION

Ressurection

Rollin’ down a freeway / with my heart chained in my lover’s arms / I can’t see straight / The night’s too late and I’ve come too far / For rest, I detest anything less than an all-out rush to the end / And may the best man win the worst man’s sin /

Rollin’ down a side road with a pistol on the dash / A true man will kill for a lady / only sick men kill for cash /

(Chorus) Pastimes and traditions / I once loved now give me the creeps / like poundin’ my foot on a floorboard or shakin’ my head at sleep / Like a cigarette / explodin’ on concrete of a moonlit street / colossal it hit but still stayed lit / Sounds like resurrection to me /

Rollin’ down a stormy sky / lookin’ God right in his evil eye / I have to ask why I’m bein’ treated treacherously / Maybe it’s ‘cuz of those hearts I stole, or my signature in the Devil’s book of souls / or maybe none of this has to do with me /

(Chorus)

The bulb is broken at the top of the stairway / but I can still see the pillow where her hair lay / The pistol is hot in my hand and the trigger burns my fingers as the bullets get bigger / But I / the victim / the true love’s soldier / believe that innocence lies in the eyes of the beholder /

There’s two hot bullets in my lady’s chamber / I’ve been shot and replaced by a stranger / Halfway to Heaven, midway up her stairs / now I’m haulin’ ass to Hell in an electric chair / My lover sleeps soft, through a cold long season, on a teetering loft of my broken love’s treason / Don’t ask me why / It must have been the lullaby I sang to to her while she was freezing /

(Chorus)

Down past Leiper’s Fork where the Harpeth bends / Mary Rose came to her end / with a watermelon pit in her mouth / Her pale blue eyes were open wide / and the snowflakes fell inside / High above her gaze / in the sky so grey / the last heron flew south /

(Chorus) Yeah the fire rolls away when there ain’t nothing left to burn / Well, those clouds roll in when summer ends / and the roses wilt in turn / The more you gave the more it took and it just ain’t fair, I know / But at least before you went to sleep / you brought a dream right into this world, yeah / Mary Rose /

That seed it cracked, as the sky turned black / and it slid on down her throat / The moon did rise to say goodbye / A whippoorwill delivered the note /

As her body sank on that muddy bank / a sprout rose through her teeth / A tear did slide from the corner of her eye / The world watched in disbelief / 

(Chorus)

As dawn came on / a little boy’s song / broke upon the Harpeth shore / at the place where Mary Rose once laid / But her body laid there no more / Instead a watermelon vine with fruit so fine / like emeralds in the snow they shone / Little Jackson Rose picked the best of those / and it tasted just like home /

(Chorus)

It’s hard making friends when nobody’s there / It’s just a sidewalk full of mirrors and vacant stares / It’s hard to share your thoughts when nobody cares / except the creepy psychotherapists selling their wares / And it’s hard to hear my heart above all this noise / It’s hard to keep filling the void with drugs and toys /

(Chorus) But right now there ain’t nothing that I wouldn’t sell / if for just one night I could dim the lights of this hell / I’d take back every wasted tip and every drop that I ever spilled / I’d walk right back to that bar and drink my fill /

It’s late and the bars are closing in on me / But here you come, giving me reason to believe / So, the morning light is dancing in your eyes / But deep inside I know the sun will never rise /

Now it’s late again and the bars are made of steel / and I’m praying again to something that just ain’t real

(Chorus)

All that I’ve known so far / have been highways, churches, jails, and bars / But they’ve rounded me well / They showed me Heaven and Hell / But the God of which they tell / was in neither cloud nor flame /

So I made up a God inside my head / But pretty soon it felt like it made me up instead / I hung its picture on the wall / One day there was nothing there at all / Just shadows of rainfall in an empty frame /

(Chorus) I had home on my mind / I guess it just takes some time to realize where I went blind / To see that home that I seek / is in every line of my cheek / So now I smile every time / I pass another mileage sign / Say, That’s that home of mine /

It was in Big Sur I lost my shoes / In a poker game to a pretty dame who traded me the blues / I took ‘em with me all the way / to that blue Manzanillo Bay / It was there they stayed burning in the fire /

(Chorus) (Slightly different)

Now the road seems to shift and swerve / every time I think I’ll finally get what I deserve / Some say you are what you earn / I say you’re nothing if you ain’t learned / That who you are / can never be for hire /

(Chorus) 

Jesus ain’t dead / he’s asleep home in bed / and Elvis is cookin’ him eggs / Hendrix and Joplin went out to go shoppin’ / They’ll be home before noon with the digs /

And all of God’s children are out busy building an ark / for to sail on the flood / But them wafers ain’t meat / They’re just made of wheat / No one ever got drunk off of blood /

(Chorus) So pass that wine around, my friends / redemption will just have to wait / We’ll be drunk by the time this world comes to an end / and I’ll see you at the old pearly gates /

Yeah, Kurt Cobain / he’s snorting cocaine with Jim Morrison at the bar / Their supper’s getting cold, and Elvis said, I done told them / Jesus said, This time they’ve gone too far  /

And all of God’s legends are out busy pledging their souls to the path of the past / But Jimi and Jim, Kurt and Janis Joplin / all laugh loud, but the kings both laugh last

(Chorus)

Jesus ain’t dead / he’s asleep home in bed / and Elvis is cookin’ him eggs

I’m not a rich man / In fact, I’m a vagabond / But after the princes have gone to chase off their blues / and left you with yours / I’ll be there for you /

I have no weapons / I haven’t much muscle or might / But after the war mongers’ fight has put blood in the moon / and it fills your whole night / I’ll be there for you /

(Chorus) Shadows come and go just like rainbows after the storm / And halos ain’t made of gold / They’re made up of all the sweet petals you’ve grown / And they’re stitched up with thorns, and bound by the balance they’ve sworn

I’m not a fall guy / but I can see through this flesh / So I no longer fear death, for if I am to die and to fade into blue / it will be of your sky / It will be of you /

(Chorus)

Bare feet on the hardwood floor / ice on the window and wind through the door /she got up before the sun today / Black hair flowing down her back / train whistle blowing from the track and it leads her mind away /

(Chorus) And she thinks about the times when the dreams filled her mind / Now the dreams are filling up her heart / And it comes to her somehow / She don’t need diamonds now / In the hard times, she’s found love /

Bed springs push him to his feet / Smells from the kitchen, it’s time to eat / He remembers the night as the day begins / He slips upon her like a playful child / She turns around and they both smile, and the train whistle blows again /

(Chorus)

They’re singing / Hungry wolves stay away from our door / We’re not afraid of the hard times anymore / It don’t matter what’s going down / We’ve got plenty to go around / Love’s the only thing we’re banking on / Through all the struggling years we’ve known / somehow the feelings of love have grown / our hearts were never overdrawn / 

They’re singing / Hungry wolves stay away from our door / we’re not afraid of the hard times anymore / It don’t matter what’s going down / We’ve got plenty to go around / In the hard times, we’ve found love / Yes, in the hard times / we’ve found love

Remember back when you were 15 /  Like the rest of the girls, obsessed with James Dean / You had liquor on your lips and tears in your eyes / all for the sake of a fake man’s lies / I was living the life of a cul de sac / I had 18 years strapped to my back / I wanted nothing more than to break the mold / but you broke me first / you were just 15 years old /

The next time I saw you / your halo was bent / Your room was filled with dried roses that your lovers had sent / Like the rest of your friends / I was full of shit / Like the rest of the drugs / you were so hard to quit /

Vanilla Baby, tequila made you crazy / The love marks you gave me / made you seem more animal than lady /

Now how many days have passed since then / Well, nobody knows / But the weather in my face / surely shows / And I can’t remember where I’ve been since then but I always knew where you were / I saw your smile on every passing mile, that’s for sure / but everything else is just a blur /

There’s a satellite / in orbit black holes might absorb it / asteroids might break its bones / But your / gravity / is pulling me like the moon pulls the sea / I’ll always make it home / Stars fall like rain here  / The lovers just disappear / So hold fast to me, Dear, the future is near / And time slips forever more, as / your slip falls to the floor / Sweat slips from every pore / This is what I live for

When you sent me packing down that Green River Valley / I knew that if you couldn’t then / no one would have me / I lost myself drinkin’ with those stray dogs in the alleys ’til the whiskey soaked my bones /

The night it came on cold / blowing off that muddy river / I felt so goddamned old I didn’t have the strength to shiver / The moon was swallowed whole and when the sky spit back that sliver / I knew I had to go it alone /

(Chorus) Love is free / so take all you can / Just don’t ask me / to be the bigger man / ‘cause I’m all spent / well I gave all I had / But living the good life brotha’ made me bad /

Go on, chase that girl / go on, get that money / Go on, break the world  I know you think it’s full of honey / Maybe someday I’ll look back and think it’s funny / how you always had to burn it down / But right now in the ashes / choking on the smoke / I find it hard to grasp this great big cosmic joke / I’m squinting through the tears / and years of lies and hope / But I know you ain’t comin’ back around /

(Chorus) (Slightly different)

Devil below and God above / take all your armies from my blood / Show me what I’m really made of / More than fear / More than love / And set me free / I’ve done all I can / Just don’t ask me to be the bigger man / ‘cause I’m all spent / I gave all I could / But living the bad life, brother / feels too good

(Chorus)

I don’t know where I am / All I see / is where I’m from / All that I do / is all that I’ve done / There’s an echo inside me / I’m lost in its ring / There’s no angel to hide me / from what it will bring /

(Chorus) Just more of the same old story, old game, old lie / But it’s a good place to hide /

Who you gonna call for help / when your well runs dry / You know you gotta save yourself so just climb inside / ‘cuz it’s a good place to hide /

This world’s made of money / My heart’s made of glass / This moment is precious / but it’s chained to the past / And even though I try / I can’t let go / So I just hold on / and dream of tomorrow / But it just brings / more of the same old story / old game, old lie / But it’s a good place to hide /

(Chorus)

I’ve lost my wife and hurt my kid, but today I’m gonna pay for the things I did / If I don’t shake this off, I’m dead / Same old ghost, new town / same old jokes, old clown / If I could, I’d burn this down / But there’s no fire in the world like the one inside, no sea so deep as the one I’ve cried / To quench my thirst, God knows I’ve tried / But so it goes / and now I know that there’s no place to hide

Santa Maria, I need your blessings / Please guide my hand / and my gun / You’ve seen my sweet señorita / and I / in deep caressing / Now if I don’t save my love, mamasita / your boy is done /

I admit, she’s not in / the purest of professions / but she’s got nothing but her body left to sell / And with your help, I was planning / to get her / into confession / and send the dirty dog that holds her / straight to Hell /

But shhhhh / Santa Maria / Don’t tell /

The people step aside as I come down the street  they can tell by my look that I’m looking for heat / My black hair’s back and there’s spurs on my feet / a six gun’s the only tongue I got that speaks / And everybody knows who I came here for / the name Sand Man hangs on his door / And everybody knows that I can’t afford to buy my love, so I’m stealing his whore /

Sand Man, come outside, I scream, I’m hungry for your blood / I’m finding you guilty for the crime of putting a price on love / The penalty is death, I say, Come on and beat it if you can / The door swings wide; the children hide / Santa Maria, hold my hand /

Are you talking to me he says, I can’t believe your cahones / never mind the gun that you’re pointing at me, hombre / You’ve gotta lotta nerve, son, comin’ to serve some / death warrant to the fastest gun in the desert / But never mind that now / It’s too late to go back / You’re gonna die for your angel and there’s honor in that / Though I should probably let you know that there’s only whores here / You’ll die anyway /  Oh well, vivir es morir /

I pull my pistol quick / I let go a few loud shots / The adrenalin runs like razors and my stomach’s all in knots / I’m choking on the gun smoke / and I’m trying not to believe / that the Sand Man’s lead is lodged inside me, and there’s blood running down my sleeve /

Santa Maria, I feel I’m dying / My soul’s as empty as my pockets / Santa Maria, is that you crying / I feel the world roll just like my eyes in their sockets /

What’s this now I don’t know how there’s light coming up behind the one that shot me down  Lift my head up off the ground / to see the Sand Man turning around / There’s a gun at his head, staring him down, held tightly in my señorita’s hand / Tu erés el diablo / Adios, Sand Man / CLICK BANG /

Now I’m leaning on my girl as I stagger down the street / I never thought death was something I could ever cheat / But the bullet in my shoulder hurts every time I hold her; it reminds me of Maria / and all I owe her.. / I am just a poor boy from north Michuacan / Now we live in Saulitas / we have both retired our guns / And the bullet near my heart forever reminds me of that day / when Santa Maria shouted loud as a gunshot just to say / LOVE SAVES

released February 14, 2017

The third and final installment of the Gasoline Lollipops’ Lucky 7 Trilogy, “Resurrection” is the Boulder, Colorado alt-country band’s debut LP.

Death

death

Hey there Mr. P.H.D. / my pain is a mystery /could you use your therapy / to tell me what is wrong with me / Well, hold on son, we’ve just begun / don’t go jumpin’ the proverbial gun /
if you want to be understood talk about your childhood /

(Chorus) I remember the rain / on a sunny day / I remember the way it sounds / and I remember the road / and all the miles we drove but I don’t remember where we were bound / and death was all around /

Come on, doc, don’t hesitate / I told you true so shoot me staight / Oh, my God, I’m a real psycho / I know you’re about to tell me so / Hold on son, we’ve just begun / don’t go jumpin’ the proverbial gun / If you want to know what’s wrong
you gotta talk about your mom /

(Chorus)   I remember her songs / moving through her pipe-organ veins / each time her heart beat pounded / And I remember her voice / like oak and abalone / made me cry, each time it sounded / and death was all around /

Come on Doc, them’s the facts / I told you true so tell me flat / Oh my God, I’m gonna go to hell / tell my friends I said farewell / Well, hold on son, we’ve just begun / don’t go jumpin’ the proverbial gun /
Even though it might make you raw / we got to talk about your pa

I remember feelin’ lost in that old graveyard / but just before I’d cry / he would appear / He taught me that even when he was near I was alone / and how not to fear the tombstone /

It’s true son, you’re pretty ill but take this pill and you’ll feel / fine / and call me if you ever feel up or down / and now I’m livin’ life on a flat line / and I hardly ever notice that death, death, death, /death is still around 

God is in the jack / the devil’s in the ace / I’m a king bettin’ on his queen / but a deuce took her place / Now I’m on the run / the bookie’s makin’ chase / I don’t know what I’m runnin’ from / I’ll never leave this place /

All the dreams I ever had / I drank and drowned within / Now the bottle’s empty, though my head still spins / and this room, and this world, and my friends and kin / in a blaze of glory, then it’s dark again /

(Chorus) My heart is like a ghost town / my veins are empty streets / I’m a wedding gown after the great divorce / I try to keep my head down and my mind off of defeat / but the nightmares just come with greater force /

The church is always closed / the graveyard’s ever open / A steady flow of ghosts roll out like fog / And all the wicked roads I chose / led me down to bein’ broken / where the wind beats you with the breath of God /

(Chorus)

My halo flew to heaven, left me below / But no one will ever know / because the angel in me never showed / I’d be in with the devil if I could find those crossroads /

Show me a time that ain’t been laced with pain and cryin’ / Show me a soul that ain’t been riddled with stains and holes / And I would show you to the devil / if I could find those crossroads

Sick in the head / from the heart, to the bed / I lie amidst the rubble of all the sweet things you said / Your perfume’s on the pillow and your ring’s beside the sink /Your picture’s on the wall and inside everything I think /

I won’t sleep / tonight, I know / What the hell am I still doing here / There’s nowhere else to go / Your silence kills more than your lies / So come on, put me out of my misery / I’m praying that you’re brave tonight /

(Chorus) I want to tear this down so I can see / All that wide-open space where I used to be / I want to watch it burn, this failed bed frame / It never held us anyway and now it never will again /

While you lie with your lover unaware of what you kill / I realize I’ve never seen you / now I know I never will / But I hope some day that you find your home / And maybe someday I’ll learn to live alone /

If this ain’t enough what more could I do / Everything I’ve ever loved now belongs to you / What about the truth was so hard to face / That you’d rather leave me in this place /

(Chorus) I want to tear it down, so I can see / That wild open lover that I used to be / I want to watch it burn / this whole sick game / Along with your memory / your love for me / your face / your name / Sofia

I have not been well / I’ve been drinkin’ too much whiskey / and thinkin’ too much hell / I just wanna be free / but I can’t deny the weight of these chains / bearing down on me /

(Chorus) Just give me a fast train / the fuck outa here / Give me a hard rain / make it all disappear / I just wanna lay my head down / and sleep while I ride / wake up when it’s over / over on the other side /

I’ve been sleeping under water / I can’t even hear her / I nearly forgot her / and I’m nothing but a masquerader stealing life from my creator /

(Chorus)

Met a greyhound girl in Davenport / stayed up all night on speed / Left her in Denver at daybreak / with more lies than she’ll ever need /

I combed my hair in a truckstop mirror / and swore to start over again / but now that’s past / and it’s plain / that I’m just the same drunk rambler as I was back then /

(Chorus) So give me the shot to cure my pain / whether or not the cure and death are the same / I wanna feel these dreams runnin’ in my vein / but first, give me the shot to kill my pain /

All my saviors must be stuck in traffic / and all my friends just keep buyin’ me drinks / I’m lookin’ for a sign, but none have passed yet / so I say, as I sink /

These states are no more than my footsteps / these countries are no more than crimes / All my dreams have borders / I can’t live behind these lines /

(Chorus)

I drove up I-65 to the downtown exit / and I felt I had arrived / I found myself walkin’ up 2nd Avenue / I laid my case down at my feet / and tucked in a doorway of that busy street / I started playin’ and waitin’ for dreams to come true / The water was high, and I could smell it from here / and all the southern belles and the cheap beer /

The Bellsouth tower was silhouetted in black / and aside from velvet thunder / it was the only thing with a color like that / at least this close to the Wild Horse Saloon / But that old muddy river continued to rise / as I played and was paid by the distaste in their eyes / It must’ve been them old-timey tunes /

(Chorus) Nashville / who will / save you from yourself / now that you’ve killed Hank Williams /

It hadn’t rained for over a week / so no one could explain why the Cumberland was on Broadway Street /  headin’ up to the Ryman Opry House / but I heard Hank’s songs in the waves as they would break / He was singin’ sad and sayin’ it was too late / They’d already sold their souls off just like Faust /

(Chorus)

I’ll sail away with the legacy on my guitar case / singin’ your eulogy / and I hope you can float on top of your millions

Cardboard and wood strewn across the floor / damn stove won’t fire up anymore / You know it’s getting cold out / when the wasps / come down to walk /

Look at them bottles piled up in the sink Honey / you haven’t missed any miracles here / I traded in my weightlessness / for this bitter chair I’m sitting in /

(Chorus) All this longing keeps me high / I dreamed up all them stars / could’ve been bright / like Orion thrown from a winter’s night / on some foreign coast /

(Chorus Continued) Sick of hanging around / sick of hanging around / I’m sick of hanging around / just me and your ghost /

Bought me a little house just outside of town / It’s perfect for one / but two’s a crowd / That’s alright with me for now / ‘cuz I don’t see you around / except for everywhere, I mean your ghost / it follows me down / into my dreams when I sleep /
she’s up in the morning /

(Chorus)

Cardboard and wood strewn across the floor /damn stove won’t fire up anymore / You know it’s getting cold out when the wasps come down to walk / Look at them bottles piled up in the sink / Honey, you haven’t missed any miracles here / Just me and an old friend / and we’re sharin’ a drink

(Chorus Continued)

released October 31, 2014

Engineered, mixed and mastered by Andrew Gragg Lundsford at Kodiak Lake Studio in Ward, Colorado.

Dawn

Dawn

Dawn opened my window / came into my room stumbling / Sent my alphabet block dream castle crumbing / Fumbling for the light switch / singing in pitch with the lark /

(Chorus) She moves slow / and graceful / Pulling the stitch that holds me to the dark /

I stood stark and bare against the morning like a babe / The cool air, bewildering / like freedom on a slave / I was saved beyond all reckoning or repair /

(Chorus, Slightly different) She moves slow and graceful / Killing with kindness the nightmares 

The city lights twirl by like a carousel / Hold on tight, we might just ride this thing to Hell / The tracks run out from underneath your sleeve / and underneath this train that takes us into Tennessee /

(Chorus) Just give us a place to lay our heads / We’ll ride these rails until we’re dead / We ain’t gonna change for no man or state / Full steam ahead /

It’s Alabama by nightfall / Louisiana by dawn / freedom, if the lawmen don’t find out which train we’re on / We got no food for cooking’ / nah the Sterno’s just for light / but the way it hits your cherry lips whets my apatite /

(Chorus)

The jungle down in Baton Rouge is more than ya ever seen / but tonight, just shut your eyes, my love, and let ’em light your dreams / ‘Cause come this time tomorrow / we’ll have reign of the whole damn camp / It might be Hell for a christian / It’s Heaven for a tramp

(Chorus x2)

Burn that white flag, I’ve gone mad / I wouldn’t fly that color to save my soul / Was it the fact I was born bad, or the guidance that I had / that designed me to self destruct before I’m sold /

(Chorus) It’s down to the wire, the stakes get higher / I walk through fire / I’ll never tire

(Verse) The key to the brave, is they think they’ll be saved / right up until the day that they’re dead and gone /I guess I’m the same / I can’t fathom my fate / so I believe my name is the chosen one / and that’s my loaded gun /

My only weakness lies between me and my woman / She’s the only thing worth bein’ weak for / If you saw my love for her, you might think I was bluffin’ / but that would only be because you never sought more / Yes, I guess perhaps you really should have thought more / on the things that you let your soul be bought for /

And tell me why / I should comply with a system that sucks /dreams dry / Will it offer me security / How much does it cost / Not much / just my right to be free

(Chorus)

(Repeat verse)

Love is like a cannonball / Open the door / or it’ll use the wall / And blow your heart into smithereens / Leave the prettiest mess that you’ve ever seen /

But how does it go when you’re on your own / Love is a river / you’re a sinking stone / It rose like the sun light filled up your home / But it sank like a bomb and left you shivering to the bone

Love is like a speeding train / It’ll take you where you’re going unless you’re standing in its way / And then it blows you right off the tracks / And leaves you with regrets that you can never take back /

But these are the instruments we all paint with / The pigment of a prayer, the water of a myth /And we can destroy the only reason to live / Or we can create what they say don’t exist /

And it all just turns to fire and rain / And you will never be the same again / It’s true, you may just be a pawn in the game / But then again, this may be no game at all / Love’s a cannonball

(Verse) Hey Son, how ya been / I hear Los Angeles can turn boys to men / Yeah well, hey, Pop / you know, it’s not quite like that / It’s more like they turn dreams into cold, hard facts /

(Chorus) And I feel like coming home / I feel all alone /

Somewhere in Nebraska, a ghost of the Boss’s harp blows / and somewhere on I-80 / an 18 wheeler rolls / And there’s a little boy riding shotgun / his Papa’s listening’ to Hoyte Axton and they’re trying to find the alphabet / in the license plates as they pass ’em /

And I miss you, I’m sorry I never tell you / but a man has got an ego that won’t let him say what he needs too /

(Chorus x2)

(Verse)

I’m trying to dig up change for the Kansas Turnpike toll / I’m trying to dig up faith in the strength left in your soul / These county lines, they flash by with every cigarette /

(Chorus) Yeah, this is the longest night that I’ve had to drive through yet /

Every hotel room smells like death / The clouds across the moon move slow like your breath / I wonder why the good times were so easy to forget /

(Chorus)

The fog lights come on with the rain / Missouri is gone but not the pain / And I’m praying to God now but I don’t know if he exists / but what else could I do for you on a night like this /

Your heart still pumps blood, I wish that it pumped hope / I’m trying to bring you love at the end of your rope / I’m blowing back these speed limit signs just trying to outrun regret /

(Chorus x3) 

I wake up every morning, about the break of dawn / I hear the rooster crowing, and I’m feeling all alone / There’s honeysuckle outside my window / Dew sparkling on the vine / and those little squirrels are barking like they was mountain lions /

I get to thinking about the road / and all the times they come back again /  I was born a child of these muddy roads / and I’ll die here lonesome as the wind /

Because all my cars, they done broke down / layin’ in my front yard / I ought get one together but the work just seems too hard / A man come by this morning wanting to paint my barn / Well, he painted, See Rock City, US Hwy 31 /

I used to have a church woman you know / pretty as she could be / run off with a gospel singer down in Nashville, TN / So I drink a lot of liquor, Lord, I drink a lot of booze / I’m a midnight country rambler, you know / and I ain’t got much to lose /

I wake up a lot of mornings, laying down in jail / My head, it will be hurting’, you know, and I won’t be feelin’ too well / Now, that ol’ fat-bellied sheriff / he’ll come a walking’ up to me / He wants to know how it feels / not being free /

I tell him / It doesn’t matter lord / I don’t care a whole lot /
‘Cause I’d rather be in jail in Hell than a fat fucking cop /

A man come by this morning wanting to paint my barn / Well, he painted, See Rock City, US Hwy 31

released July 4, 2012

All songs written by Clay Rose, except “White Trash,” written by Steve Young

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